Leaders often feel more appreciation for their teams than they express.
A client recently described his team’s work on a new strategy: their creativity, their commitment to collaborating, the care they put into a high-quality outcome. He was beaming with pride.
Then I asked: “Did you tell them that?”
Silence.
By the end of the day, he’d sent an email thanking his team for their work. He also committed to telling them in person. That gap, between feeling appreciation and expressing it, is where many leaders live. Closing that gap is a high leverage move a leader can make.
This is where leadership reputation begins: not with a title or a stated intention, but with how consistently people experience you. Appreciation is one of the easiest ways to make care, attention, and respect visible to the people you lead.
Most leaders aren’t withholding appreciation because they don’t care. They’re moving quickly, scanning for risk, solving the next problem, or assuming people already know. What feels obvious to a leader is often invisible to the person doing the work. Appreciation turns what you notice into something the other person feels.
Appreciation tells your team you care about them as people, not just what they produce. It also reinforces how you become known as a leader. Your brand isn’t what you say about yourself. It’s what people experience of you, repeated over time.
Why Appreciation Is Strategic
In Towers Perrin’s 2007–2008 Global Workforce Study, only 21% of employees worldwide were fully engaged in their work. The study also found that senior leaders were among the most powerful influencers of engagement, particularly when employees believed senior management was sincerely interested in their wellbeing.
Appreciation isn’t just about being nice. It creates the conditions where people understand what matters, feel their contribution has value, and are more likely to repeat the behaviors that move the team forward.
I worked with a leadership team that had been together for about seven years. I asked each person to share something personal that the others didn’t already know. I expected this to be hard, given how long they’d known each other. It wasn’t; they’d worked side by side for years but had rarely shared at a more personal level.
The point wasn’t disclosure for its own sake. It was a reminder that even long-standing teams can work beside each other for years without really seeing each other. That one exchange opened a deeper layer of conversation in the room. People became more engaged as the day went on, and it changed how that team worked together going forward.
People want to be seen as people. Appreciation is how leaders show they care.
What Makes Appreciation Land
The most useful appreciation is specific, timely, sincere, and connected to impact. “Great job” is nice. “The way you challenged that assumption helped us avoid a weak decision” tells someone what mattered, why it mattered, and what’s worth repeating.
Consistency Is the Multiplier
Expressing appreciation once isn’t enough. It needs to become a habit before it becomes a reputation.
If considerate is a word you want people to use when they describe you, holding a door once doesn’t earn you that reputation. Consistency does. The same is true of appreciation: it has to show up regularly, attached to small wins (showing up on time) and big ones (finishing under budget), before your team believes it’s genuinely who you are.
So why don’t more leaders do this? Why can it sometimes feel forced?
Mostly, we haven’t built the habit. Leadership tends to run at a pace that rewards solving the next problem, not pausing to name what’s already working. Appreciation isn’t a soft skill; it’s a leadership muscle most people simply haven’t trained yet.
Seven Ways to Build the Habit
- Open meetings with what’s working. Share a win before the to-do list and the problems. It resets the energy in the room and opens people up to be more receptive to what comes next.
- Protect your one-on-ones. This is an opportunity to acknowledge someone for what they do well, learn more about them and their aspirations. One of the most common frustrations I hear is how often these meetings get cancelled. Honoring them sends a clear message: you matter, even when there’s no problem to solve.
- Reach out when someone exceeds expectations. Email works if you’re not there in person, but in person carries more weight. What you appreciate tends to grow, because people pay attention to what leaders notice.
- Repeat a private acknowledgment publicly, when it fits. A private thank-you can become something bigger when it’s echoed in front of the group. Done thoughtfully, it builds confidence and reinforces the person’s value.
- Close meetings by naming what people contributed. It takes less than a minute, and it helps people leave knowing their contribution was noticed.
- Notice growth and share it. If a colleague is working on their leadership – through coaching, training, or personal effort – tell them what you’ve noticed. Reinforcement is motivating, and it makes change stick.
- Ask what people care about outside of work. If someone ran a race over the weekend or played in a tournament, ask about it. Genuine interest builds trust and psychological safety. This puts people at ease to contribute, take initiative, and do good work.
Your 30-Day Appreciation Challenge
For the next 30 days, express specific appreciation every day and if you want to stretch yourself, aim for five times a day. Not generic praise. Specific, named and heartfelt.
Notice how you feel as you are practicing appreciation, at work and at home. At day 30, ask your team: “What’s changed?”
Their answer may tell you things an engagement survey can’t capture on its own. And you’ll likely find a shift in the way you notice the people around you, along with the leader you’re becoming.
Ready to Elevate Your Leadership?
At Authentic Leaders Edge, we help professionals like you develop a powerful leadership presence. Whether you’re leading a team or defining your personal brand, Dorothy Lazovik provides tailored coaching to accelerate your growth.
Book a complimentary 30-minute consultation to explore how coaching can help you step into your full potential. Email today to get started!
