There are bad habits, gestures, and behaviours that can sabotage your personal brand success and hold you back. The kicker is that you don’t even know it!
Bad habits can feel like driving your car with the emergency brake on. You notice your car has no pickup and can’t figure out why. Once you notice the emergency brake is engaged, you release it. Without any extra effort, you pick up speed.
It works the same way when you stop engaging in ‘bad habits’ that no longer support you and start replacing them with behaviours that best align with how you want to be known.
For instance, when I do my best to remain neutral on a topic I am discussing with my sons, my oldest instantly knows when I disagree with him. He pointed out that I always tilt my head to the left. My youngest son backed him up. I had no idea I was giving myself away and sabotaging how I wanted to show up!
A leader I worked with was complaining about his boss’s unreasonable requests, and at the same time, he was rolling his eyes. When he was done sharing his story, I asked, “Are you aware you were rolling your eyes while telling me your story?” He wasn’t! Can you imagine the impression he left with his boss?
To stop ‘bad habits’ that sabotage your success, it is important to know what they are and ask for the constructive feedback you need to empower change. Below are the five most common ‘bad habits’ I see leaders engage in that damage their personal brand and sabotage their ability to succeed with greater ease.
As you read the list, consider what bad habits you may be engaging in, whether you are doing it or participating by being part of it. Be an observer and raise your awareness to achieve greater alignment of how you want to be known.
FIVE MOST COMMON BAD HABITS:
#1 COMPLAINING
Complaining is negative, a waste of time and an energy drain. You tend to complain when your current circumstance doesn’t match your expectations. This means you have a reference point of how it could be, although you fall into the bad habit of complaining instead of risking what you must do to improve it. Ouch!
New Habit: Lead by making the changes you want to see and talk to the right people who can influence the change!
As you see in the example above, instead of rolling his eyes and talking about the unreasonable requests with colleagues that can’t influence change, it is important to muster up the courage and have a conversation with his boss.
Solution: approach your boss, acknowledge the request, and then ask for his/her advice on how to best balance your time between the new priority and the other projects/tasks. You are responsible for creating the link and not assuming your boss knows how long it will take. Taking this action demonstrates your strength as a leader.
#2 MAKING ASSUMPTIONS
Drawing conclusions about what others think, what they need or how they feel based on your experience can be dangerous whether it is people on your team, clients, peers or even family members. As kids, if we fell into this trap, my dad made his point by saying, “When you assume you make an ass out of you AND me.” It’s not a pretty picture.
New Habit: Lead by checking in regularly with the people you interact with to create understanding and confirm you are all on the same page. One client shared with me the great wins she and her team had experienced. She shared how happy everyone on the team was even though they put in many extra hours to achieve the outcome.
It was clear that the leader was pleased that the team pulled together to create the wins, and it felt great. It wasn’t clear how everyone on the team really felt about the workload and hours. She was assuming the wins outweighed the effort it took to get there.
Solution: Give others a voice and show how much you care by asking how they are managing or what you can do to make their experience better. You will automatically increase your ability to influence and build trust.
#3 MAKING EXCUSES
Excuses are like telling little white lies because you are not prepared to tell the truth to yourself or others. Excuses can undermine your credibility and demonstrate to others that you are unreliable.
New Habit: Lead by owning up to your part in not delivering what you promised, and focus on what you will do to make it right. If I have a commitment to meet with a client and arrive late because I chose to answer a call before leaving the office, it’s on me. I would begin by acknowledging any inconvenience to them, apologize for being late, and ask what I can do to make it up to them instead of excusing my poor choice.
Solution: Taking ownership of your behaviour is much more powerful than any excuse you come up with.
People don’t care why; they want to know how you will make it right. This action builds your credibility.
#4 COMPARING
It is so easy in a competitive environment to get distracted by what others are doing around you and fall into the ‘me too’ trap. You begin to question yourself and if you are doing the right things. Comparing is a dangerous game and one you can never win. It is important to know what your competition is up to, but don’t use that as your measure. It can derail you and your personal brand.
New Habit: Lead by using yourself as the benchmark. You can model or incorporate a behaviour you admire in others, though measure your results against what you have done before. This gives you a clear indication if you are following what is important to you and if you are truly making progress. Whether it is meeting an exercise goal, a profit goal, a sales goal or a client presentation. Did you do your best? Were your results better than last time? This becomes your measure of progress and success.
Awareness: When you compare yourself to others, you give your power away by measuring yourself by their standards, not yours. It is always a choice. You want to ensure your choices support you and empower your personal brand.
#5 INTERRUPTING
Interrupting is annoying and demonstrates a lack of respect. You may find that you jump in when someone else is talking and explain it away by stating that you were excited to share an idea or ask a question before you forgot. These are excuses disguised as reasons to justify your bad behaviour. It is rude and not how you want to be remembered.
New Habit: Lead by being more intentional about the part you play in each conversation you have. Listen to understand the person who is speaking. When you engage at this level, you are more likely to stay focused on what is being said versus what you want to say.
Solution: If an idea or question pops into your mind, write it down and ask when the person talking has finished. This demonstrates respect and taking the time to hear what they had to say.
It is easy for many of us to fall into these traps. What is crucial to your success is how regularly you engage in these ‘bad habits’ and resetting to align with how you want to be known.
WHAT CAN YOU DO?
Being aware of your bad habits allows you to create change for the better. Choose a habit that no longer supports you and one you want to work on. Be intentional about how you want to show up. Practice the new habit until you have it mastered, then move on to the next one you want to improve. If you misstep, reset with the person or people to remain in step with how you want to be known.
Align yourself with what matters most to you. Live your brand fully expressed with intention and purpose to play bigger!
Are you interested in having a conversation to explore how you can define your personal brand and accelerate your growth as a leader, individually or as a team? Send an email to book a complimentary 30-minute consultation.
